I want to secretly stalk Carolyn Bruck so bad that it’s driving me crazy.

For those of you not awake and watching news from 5-7 am, weekdays, you are missing out.  I used to be an NBC, channel 4 guy but Miss Ohio 2008 Monica Day just isn’t working for me anymore.  So here I am now addicted to ABC channel 6 just staring down Carolyn Bruck.  Her titties are so angry that they just sit there on the dash growling at me.  GRRR!  Yeah Baby!  I mean I’m at the YMCA working out, I got the Quiet Storm dominating the shit out of the elliptical like he’s all pissed off at Rashaan Salaam for going out on a speaking tour; old dudes and their saggy balls; no female talent at all – so what did you expect out of me?  Carolyn, if you are reading this I’m not serious but am totally serious.  Which twitter account is legit?  Is it @carolynwsyx6 or @carolynbruck?  Should I FB this chick?  In my head right now…I’ll see you Friday…

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Proving once again that for every crazy bitch out there, some dude is tired of banging her.

Yahoo!Police say a former Miss New Hampshire USA faces a simple assault charge stemming from a confrontation with her boyfriend. Police say Sunday that 26-year-old Nicole Houde was arrested Wednesday. Authorities say the Manchester beauty queen punched, kicked, scratched and bit 33-year-old Scott Nickerson, also of Manchester. Police say the two were arguing and Nickerson took Houde’s cellphone, prompting the physical confrontation. Houde was the 2010 Miss New Hampshire USA. Miss New Hampshire USA and Miss Teen New Hampshire USA are distinct from Miss New Hampshire and Miss America pageants.

What’s that saying? A picture is worth a thousand words?  I guess ‘crazy’ just won’t cut it then unless we took [(31.622776601683793319988935444327 'crazies') ^2].

Obviously this chick is a dick wrecker.  She is intense and I like it.  Out to prove something.  My kind of slut.  Hard anal is on the platter.  The problem is – is it all worth it?  Does A2M cancel out the ‘crazy’ side of things?  At first sure, but then you realize you’ll take some Friday night drunk sex with a somewhat mentally normal chick.

P.S. Is New Hampshire smaller then Delaware?

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This NBPA / Billy Hunter / Derek Fisher union shit just got REAL interesting…

Yahoo!On the weekend of the 2009 All-Star game in Phoenix, Pat Garrity, the treasurer of the National Basketball Players Association, walked into a conference room inside the Sheraton Phoenix determined to make one final stand in his decade of service to the union. Garrity had warned peers and NBPA executive director Billy Hunter prior to the ’09 executive committee meeting that he planned to challenge Hunter on business practices, and several players purposely steered clear of the confrontational scene. In the aftermath of the U.S. banking crisis in 2008, Garrity had grown increasingly suspicious of an investment bank project that Hunter had been pitching to the executive committee and player representatives. For Garrity and some peers in the NBPA, the investment made no sense. Hunter had sought a $7 million to $9 million investment from the union into Interstate Net Bank of Cherry Hill, N.J., a financial institution that federal and state banking regulators had slapped with debilitating “cease-and-desist” orders, sources said. Garrity discovered information online that left him feeling obligated to confront Billy Hunter: Hunter’s son, Todd, had a seat on the board of directors of Interstate Net Bank. Todd Hunter is also a vice president for Prim Capital, which has a consulting contract with the NBPA that has paid the company in excess of $2.5 million since 2006, according to U.S. Department of Labor filings. “Why didn’t you disclose any of this?” Garrity asked Hunter several times at the 2009 meeting, witnesses told Yahoo! Sports. When reached by phone, Garrity confirmed the description of events that sources provided Yahoo! Sports. He declined to further comment. Hunter declined comment for this story through a union spokesman. At the meeting, Hunter left the talking to longtime ally and NBPA chief counsel, Gary Hall, and Hall wasn’t offering answers. Garrity and Hall screamed back and forth, and Garrity’s questions weren’t addressed, witnesses said. Finally, witnesses said, Hall – who died on May 11, 2011 – told Garrity that he was a retired player, no longer welcome on the executive committee, and that security would be called to remove him unless he left on his own. With executive committee members Keyon Dooling and Adonal Foyle appearing uncomfortable – and NBPA president Derek Fisher refusing to use his authority to demand Garrity be allowed to speak over Hall’s yelling – Garrity left the room, left the NBPA and never returned again. Fisher declined comment.

The story on Yahoo! goes on, more in-depth regarding the money and the Billy Hunter conflicts of interests and to be honest – I was expecting something like this to break once I heard the union was trying to get Derek Fisher to resign from his position as union president.  Derek Fisher, while I obviously don’t know the guy, seems on the outside like a stand-up dude.  He’s polished; when he speaks he is very articulate and every word that comes out of his mouth is intelligently spoken. Put simply, there is nothing that seems shady about him.  Just seems like a fair dude without an agenda.

Here’s a pie chart from the Yahoo! article in case you don’t make it over there.  Pretty interesting….(scratching my chin)….

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Does this look like the face of a baby that enjoys Oreos and breast milk as much as I do?

MSNHumans are trained from a young age to know that Oreos demand milk in order to be enjoyed correctly. A new South Korean ad for the cookies makes this point very clear by showing a young consumer turning to mom, literally, to make the most of his snacking experience. The ad, featuring the tag line, “Milk’s favorite cookie,” shows an infant holding one of the delicious treats while nursing at a woman’s breast. As with most things showing explicit breastfeeding, a donnybrook has broken out among commenters. Some see the ad as the light humor it’s meant to be, but a few killjoys are taking it way too seriously: “No kid would care for any fcuking [sic] oreo while being breastfed.” Someone needs a cookie.

Hell yes!  This is exactly how we roll in our house!  Doesn’t matter if it’s an Oreo or Chips Ahoy! – titty milk and cookies are like boats and ho’s in this house!

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Somebody get me (and Arkansas) and – well the entire NCAA – this lie detector machine!

When I say that I need one of these stat – I mean it!  Does Brookstone have these?!

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Are the Democrats just pissing right in the conservative Republican’s faces?

Over the weekend some Secret Service and U.S. Military members had an orgy with some Colombian prostitutes and guys are being sent home like 5 year-olds.  I should probably mention that prostitution is LEGAL in Colombia.  Now today this picture gets released of Hillary Clinton liquored up in Colombia at Cafe’ Havana.  Latin America is where it’s AT!  Just throwing piss and beer and cum and Clinton right in the Republicans conservative eyeball. Chips and salsa for days!

P.S. – I LOVE this from Hillary.  Damn right!  Just have always had a thing for her – even before Monica; not so much her daughter….

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First a Vegas hangover bus and now new brides are using feeding tubes to lose pre-wedding pounds

Last week I read on MSNBC about this Doctor starting some hangover service in Vegas using a bus to treat clients and I thought, dude, isn’t that the whole point of going to Vegas?  To get nasty drunk leveraging the oxygen that the casinos pump through the duct work, all the while gambling and wishing you went to M.I.T.

Now today I see on Yahoo! that brides-to-be are opting for feeding tubes to lose weight before their wedding day.  Fucking America needs to step her game back up! There are rules of engagement for Vegas and Weddings.

Vegas: When you go to Vegas, prepare to get drunk, gamble, act like you are somebody famous and then fly 5 hours home with a pounding headache.

Engagement: BYOB ain’t Bring Your Own Bag.  It’s Build Your Own Bitch.  When a guy asks you to marry him, part of getting down on his knee means that he expects some sacrifice from you.  After all, he just spent 5 grand on your diamond so you can spend at least 5 weeks in the gym away from Tollhouse, Nestle and Breyers.  The engagement “contract” does not include you walking around the house for 10 days with a colostomy bag and a hose running up a nostril.  Save that look for 40 years.

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Pippa Middleton as ‘herself’ in “The Smoking Gun”

TheUKSun - Prince William’s sexy sister-in-law was last night facing a grilling by outraged cops over the antics in Paris — as it reels from a series of gun massacres across France. Three male chums were with her in an Audi convertible. The driver took out the weapon and brandished it in broad daylight. He waved it in the air and pointed it at a photographer — whose snaps show the chilling moment the barrel of what looks like a semi-automatic stared straight down his lens.

How about Pippa Middleton as the next ‘Bond Girl’?  Her name already works and she’s as hot as they cum, straight Stella, top-five, you cheat on your wife with her and tell your wife about it.  Listen, when you are richer then Richie you can do shit like this and get away with it plain and simple.  Non issue really if you ask me.  Just some rich, white gangsta’s flashing pistols, trying to be James Bond – not too mention, even rich girls will ‘spring a leak’ with a move like this – just natural lubrication to whip out a gun in front of a girl.  I quit pulling out my concealed weapon in front of chicks because I got tired of having my seats cleaned.  Seriously.  That shit ain’t cheap!    You think I’m playing with all that Bond talk – well – let this white bikini reinforce my point…

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